My Inner Consultant

I have several critics that like to give their 2 cents, and sometimes 5 dollars worth of advice while I am in the process of dreaming and creating.  Most of what they have to offer to me is stifling and destructive, not uplifting and creative.  But I have been working on integrating these shadow sides of my life, and I have been thinking about the gifts I receive from my inner critics.  Namely, I appreciate that they help me have higher standards than I would without them.  I just think they don’t need to be quite so mean about it.  Tonight I have decided to replace the least helpful, and most grueling old sourpuss of an inner critic there ever was.

I have a critic that sounds much like an old crabby grade school teacher who has been at it way too long and no longer remembers that she once liked children.  Her patience and energy is about a dime thick. She has short gray hair, worn in a smart perm, and wears only sensible clothing.  She prides herself on never having broken one single rule in her entire life and whatever creativity she once possessed was long dismissed.  She gives me advice like,”why on earth would you bother to make a thing like that when anyone could just go to Walmart and buy it for less than half what you could sell it for!  Pottery is not supposed to look like that, and you should have gone to school. I don’t know who you think you are!” She makes me feel like I should buy a new wardrobe of sweatpants, turn on my TV, and spend the rest of my life answering phone calls in an insurance office forty hours a week.  With this woman on my side there really is no use in trying.

I would like to replace her.

My new inner critic is a wise woman with long gray hair and gorgeous flowing clothes made with luscious fabrics, and fabulous prints.  She wears big funky jewelry and has a wonderful sense of humor.  She has spent her life working with children because she is enchanted with their creativity and is energized by their imagination and enthusiasm.  She delights in helping people turn passion into finished product.  Her home is filled with precious handmade objects, rich colors, and magnificent art pieces.  She values the spirit that inhabits things made by hands, by artists, and is happy to pay for it, especially when it means supporting another’s dream.  I will call her my inner consultant instead of inner critic and I will consult her regarding my wild big dreams and ask for her help in turning them into reachable goals.  When I visit her she will make us licorice root tea served in cozy ceramic mugs and we will sit on her red velvet couches and get excited about the infinite possibilities that the future holds.

Aaaaaaaah.  Much better.



  1. Mom said,

    August 25, 2010 at 12:04 am

    Yes, much better. I do not like your first critic at all; she is very mean and has a stick up her bum; I hope you will not spend time with her because she does not the capacity is inside you. But if you listen to her, consider what she is trying to teach you about who you are (and more importantly who you are NOT). I love your consultant, and I hope you will spend long afternoons in her presence, admiring your own “voice”, style and creativity, drinking that licorice root tea. Every now and then you’ll produce a dud. So what? What’s the worst thing that can happen? The creativity teacher at our work retreat said those were happy “accidents” that were meant to be. Somebody’s going to like that dud. Kwame told me that too–that he puts his “mistakes’ out for sale with everything else and people find something in them they like. Ditch the sourpuss and let every little masterpiece shine with the rest:) Love you honey, Mom

  2. Mom said,

    August 25, 2010 at 12:05 am

    That was, “she does not understand the creative capacity and unique style that is inside you”. . .

  3. marthajewel said,

    August 26, 2010 at 4:53 pm

    Does your inner consultant freelance? Does she have a sister who makes hot chocolate?

  4. jody said,

    August 28, 2010 at 3:55 pm

    I agree every “dud” I have ever seen of yours has been a master piece in my eyes and I would greatly pay good money for anything your magical hands has created. Just because it’s not your favorite piece does not mean it’s not a treasure to others 🙂

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